Anna Little To Seek State Senate (Or Assembly) Nomination

Highlands, April 1- Former Highlands Mayor Anna Little is preparing to run for State Senate or Assembly, depending on the configuration of the new legislative map that will be announced on Sunday in Trenton.

“This is not about me,” said Little, “the people, born and unborn, are asking me to do this.”

Should Highlands remain in a district with Wall and Asbury Park, Little will jump into the fray between Senator Sean Kean and Republican publisher Dan Jacobson. “I can’t tell you how many people have called me since the news that Jacobson was running. It is bad enough that no body knows where Kean stands on LIFE and that the gay marriage bill was a “tough decision” for him.  The prospect of an unholy man like Dan Jacobson in the Senate is truly frightening. The people have asked me to prevent that from happening.”

Little’s chief strategist, Larry Vote Cirignano, said that some proposed maps have Highlands in a district largely comprised of the Bayshore, long considered Little’s base. “In that scenario, Anna will run for Assembly,” said Vote, “that’s Joe Kyrillos’ Senate seat. Kyrillos has been a good friend to Anna, he’s like part of the Army.  I don’t like Joe much, but Anna said she would not run against him.”

What about the incumbent Assembly members in that district? Cirignano was not concerned, “Old Bridge and Sam Thompson could be moved to another district, in which case there would be a vacancy.  If Little Silver and Declan O’Scanlon are part of the district, Anna would be the top vote getter in a three way primary between O’Scanlon and Amy Handlin.”

Little said that her election to the State Legislature would not stop her quest to unseat Congressman Frank Provolone, “You don’t understand, the people want me to do this.  It’s all part of the plan.  It will be easier to raise money to defeat Pallone if I’m holding state office.  Besides, I really need the legislative salary and the people want me to have it.”

Cirignano said fund raising was not a concern. “We’re waging a campaign to get 3 million people, born and unborn, to contribute $25 each to Anna’s Ambition, our new 501 CRAZEE.”

Posted: April 1st, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Anna Little | Tags: | 10 Comments »

10 Comments on “Anna Little To Seek State Senate (Or Assembly) Nomination”

  1. LOL said at 6:56 am on April 1st, 2011:

    Another classic April 1st Post!!

  2. Joe said at 6:57 am on April 1st, 2011:

    Clearly an April Fool’s joke but not surprisingly if this was posted on say April 5th, no one would think it was false. Scary that it is likely so close to reality.

  3. Jgirl said at 10:02 am on April 1st, 2011:

    Everyone knows Anna Little is finished except Anna and Larry. Hopefully your satirical gem will open their eyes.

  4. CommonSense said at 10:33 am on April 1st, 2011:

    I seriously hope this is an April Fools post and there is nothing serious about this entry. If not, and Anna runs, our state is going to hell in a hand bag

  5. TR said at 12:28 pm on April 1st, 2011:

    You had me for a minute. Then I looked at the Tags.

    good one.

  6. anonymous said at 1:11 pm on April 1st, 2011:

    I opened this this morning and (before realizing today is April 1st) said, “oh lordie be-ANOTHER request for money? Four in one week?!? I don’t believe this is a usual and customary campaign strategy-why are they again asking for donations?”

    The first 2 comments set me straight.

    Thanks, Art-for showing us another side of you: your great sense of humor.

  7. brian d said at 2:51 pm on April 1st, 2011:

    This proves there is a fine line between reality and delusions.

  8. JerryW45 said at 3:32 pm on April 1st, 2011:

    Are you talking about Anna there, brian d? 🙂

  9. Jgirl said at 10:35 am on April 3rd, 2011:

    Apparently I am not the only one who remembers Anna Little altering the Pledge of Allegiance (at the rally with Governor Christie right before the election) to suit her agenda…”liberty and justice for all..born and unborn.”
    All of her antics since November 2, including the infamous donation Christmas card and gate crashing at Diane Gooch’s house a la Salahi, pale in comparison to such despicable arrogance.

  10. MoreMonmouthMusings » Blog Archive » MMM Year In Review - April said at 10:35 am on December 28th, 2011:

    […] is customary, April started with a joke.   This year the month of April ended with two jokes; the school board elections  and the […]