To combat hate, share your love

By Art Gallagher

August 12, 1958 was a big day in my mother’s life. I don’t even remember it

I’ve intentionally stayed out the the raging debate over the terrible events in Virginia last weekend and the adequacy, or lack thereof, of President Trump’s response to them.

I consider most of the ranting, from both the left and the right, to be bullshit political posturing, or ass covering, that will make no positive difference at all in improving our quality of life. It won’t make a positive difference how we relate to people who don’t look like us, dress like us or talk like us.  On the contrary, the raging narrative in the media seems to be increasing our divisions.

The best result, so far, of the current media narrative is that we are apparently no longer on the verge of nuclear war with the crazy fat kid in North Korea and the Russians are apparently no longer attempting to hijack our republic.

I’m inviting my little corner of the Internet to use the upset caused by recent events to create some love and harmony. I think its contagious.

Forgive someone. Many of us are holding grudges against friends or loved ones. Maybe they’re currently in former friends status and you’ve “blocked” your love.  “Unblock” them with forgiveness, even if they don’t want it, deserve it or need it.  Do it now and start communicating. Doing it now might make your holidays (131 shopping days till Christmas) more pleasant.  Forgive someone for not forgiving you.  Keep forgiving them when they keep you “blocked.”

Do something for someone you’ve been meaning to do but haven’t gotten around to doing.  The timing and the circumstances may never be right or perfect.  This post is the opportunity you’ve been waiting for.

Strike up a conversation with someone who doesn’t look like you. Press through the discomfort and notice that voice screaming in your head.  Start talking anyway. Then stop talking and listen.  Don’t worry about the person thinking you’re weird.  You are weird to that person. Communicate anyway.

Help someone who needs it, especially if they don’t look like you.  Sherrice Lyles and her four children still need help.  The gofundme campaign I helped her set up has raised $4720.00 so far, but it’s not enough to house the family of five until they get back into their home and replace all of the belongings they lost in the fire last Thursday. Sherrice and four children ages 2-11, have been staying in one hotel room.

Sherrice Lyles and NBC’s Brian Thompson. photo via facebook

Many people have been very generous outside of the gofundme campaign with offers of furniture, clothes and supplies.  But that stuff has to be stored until their home is ready. Not all of it can be used. Foodtown and the Scaduto and Azzolina families have offered free groceries.  That’s huge, but it doesn’t help them in the hotel.  Please give some money. Now.

Acknowledge and celebrate peaceful diversity where you find it. Monmouth County Clerk Christine Giordano Hanlon mentioned to me yesterday how the conduct at the LD 30 Republican special election in Wall on Monday evening was different from the media narrative.

“District 30 is a very diverse district that stretches from the beaches of Spring Lake to the western part of the County in Howell south to Lakewood,” Hanlon said. “It encompasses two counties with — towns that have divergent cultures, economies and priorities. All came together in a dignified, cordial, tolerant and peaceful gathering to choose the assembly candidate. There was no hate, there was no bigotry, there was no animosity.”


Get over it and get over yourself.  Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. In the long run we’re all dead.  Don’t sweat the small stuff.  You really are not that big a deal.  Your mother used to wipe your ass.  Someday an orderly will do it.

Say something good about someone. Maybe it’s just me, but very often in conversation when another person’s name comes up, a disparaging remark gets made about that person. “Did you know so and so did such and such?”  “I wonder what so and so is really up to?” “Did you hear that so and so is having a whoop-di-doo with whatshername?”  I do it too.   Let’s not and say something nice.

Put down your phone and make eye contact with someone. Do it now.


Posted: August 16th, 2017 | Author: | Filed under: Art Gallagher, Monmouth County News, Opinion | Tags: , , , | 7 Comments »

7 Comments on “To combat hate, share your love”

  1. Mike Harmon said at 1:33 pm on August 16th, 2017:

    God Bless President Trump !

  2. Ditto!! said at 1:59 pm on August 16th, 2017:

    And shame on the gutless wonders in our own party, as well as the business guys our president is helping by reducing regs, and causing them to get even richer! A good friend has said for years: ” God save us from fellow Republicans!”- their lack of conviction and integrity of belief and purpose ( and, fear of losing one damn vote,) has so emboldened the crazies on both extreme left and extreme right, that I fear we are getting close to a Mao and/or Castro- like revolution in this country, and, it is making the ’60’s unrest many of us lived through, look like kindergarten. Is toppling statues today, leading to book- burnings, blowing up public property, and throwing people into camps, next? Yes, unless and until the so- called ” leaders” grow a set, call out the Guard in all places where this erupts, when necessary, and repeat the words: “we have ZERO tolerance for any more destruction of public property- stop it, or you will be tear- gassed, thrown in jail, and forego your rights to both freedom of speech and assembly, if you cannot control yourselves and behave!” Enough!!

  3. Tom Stokes said at 7:26 pm on August 16th, 2017:

    First, NOKO nukes, then nutty nazis, now leftie loons…

    Nazi is slang for “National Socialist”; the antifa group is a Global Socialist group; Socialist, Communist, NO difference.

    Conservatives are for the free maket, not government socialism.

    Violence by any group, alt left, alt right, or racists like BLM or KKK, must be repudiated and laws enforced.

    Pewrhaps if Christians would understand that part of the Lord’s Prayer, “Fogive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us” more Love and Understanding would result.

    We are ALL Americans, regardless of our different heritage, ethnicity, religion, skin color, race or whatever else the liberals would divide us by. We all bleed the same RED blood.

    The hate spewed by the Never Trump RINOS, news media, alt left is obscene. Hatred from any group creates a reaction from another. The alt left refuses dialog; look at how they shut down college speakers who have conservative views.

    Wake Up, America! You are being played by an agenda driven news media and uber liberals, like the Workers World Party, who illegally destroyed a monument in Durham, NC. Sounds suspiciously like communist supporters, doesn’t it?

    Dialogue and Debate, not Destruction, is the only way. Unfortunately, there are groups who will shut down any dialogue with threats of violence. This must end now. The alternative might be be a new, and catastrophic, Civil War.

    Harmony not hate. Debate, not devastation.
    Prayer, not politics.

    Make America Great Again! #MAGA

  4. Tom Stokes said at 2:30 pm on August 18th, 2017:

    Horton Who?

    Another loonie leftie who can’t read and mislabels everything.

    National Socialist, Global Socialist, Communist are not supporters of the free market. They are BIG GOVERNMENT, and loonie lefties like you just want to collect the government (ie-taxpayer) handouts for no work.

    Go back under the dung heap of history where you belong. That’s where most Nazis and Commies are now; with more to come.

  5. Horton Fromish said at 3:05 pm on August 18th, 2017:

    I happen to be a free markets capitalist. it’s the extreme right that believes Nazis and socialists are the same thing. it’s fine to oppose socialism, as I do, but if you cannot distinguish morally between a dumb economic theory and outright racism and anti-Semitism, then you’ve just admitted that you’re brain is a doorknob.

  6. Tom Stokes said at 9:53 pm on August 18th, 2017:

    Horton Who?

    What are you smoking or snorting? Methinks your brain is too addled to read or understand.

    And how did I not distinguish morally between racism and anti semitism (you left out anti Catholic as the Klukers also hate Roman Catholics)?

    I suggest when your brain clears from whatever you’re using, reread my original comments (ie-“Violence by any group, alt left, alt right, or racists like BLM or KKK, must be repudiated and laws enforced.”)

    I also stated , “We are ALL Americans, regardless of our different heritage, ethnicity, religion, skin color, race or whatever else the liberals would divide us by. We all bleed the same RED blood.”

    Since you are so impotent in terms of your own brain power, perhaps you have only proved you either are just plain stupid, have your own alt whatever agenda, or are a racist in disguise trolling along.

    I will pray that your sanity might be restored and your brain function like a human being again.

  7. Tom Stokes said at 1:37 pm on August 22nd, 2017:

    Horton Who?

    BLM chants “What do we want? Dead Cops.” A Black Power activist, Micah Johnson, shot and killed five Dallas police officers. Yes, there is a moral equivalency between racists of any color who would kill others. Calling for violence is just as bad as the violence itself.

    If you agree that is only societal change you are no different than BLM, the KKK, the commies or nazis. You appear to side with the antifa hate group (more of a big government socialist movement).

    People who espouse violence against the police, against people based on their skin color, based upon their religion, are just plain sick, as you seem to be. You should be ashamed.

    It appears to me that you suffer from STDs (Severe Trump Derangement Syndrome) and may need medical assistance. Let go of the hatred in your heart – you might live longer.

    Liberty! Freedom! End Big Government controls over the people!

    Make America Great Again!