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Satan’s Motorized Scooters in Asbury Park

By Tommy DeSeno

Asbury Park Deputy Mayor Amy Quinn

This column will mention Asbury Park Deputy Mayor Amy Quinn as well as her friends.  Nothing is their fault.  There’s just no way to tell the story without them.

This past August, Asbury Park started allowing motorized scooters here.  Deputy Mayor Quinn led the effort.

Quinn, the darling of local Democrats, selected a company called Spin for the scooters. Spin appears to be an eco-friendly San Francisco start-up that fits well with Asbury’s woke progressives who hate oil companies and long for Congresswoman AOC’s Green New Delusion. The reality?  Spin is a wholly owned subsidiary of Ford Motor Company.  Big Industry.  Big oil.  The transportation equivalent of a Red Lobster on the Boardwalk.

Amy Quinn really, really wants her pet project to do well.  Apparently, so does the Asbury Park Press.

The Asbury Park Press has done a series of articles on these scooters, all filled with “man on the street” interviews of people giving glowing reviews. What did the Press leave out?  Everyone interviewed was a card-carrying member of the Amy Quinn Fan Club.  Let me introduce you to them.

-One is a City employee.

-One is Amy’s next-door neighbor and zoning board appointee.

-One is the Chair of the Asbury Park Democrat Party.

-One is the Chair of the Asbury Park Young Democrats, partner in an entity with Quinn, who considers Quinn her mentor.  She probably rides her scooter past Quinn’s house more times in a day than Ducky Dale rode his bike past Molly Ringwald’s house in Pretty in Pink.

All of them appear in more social media pictures with Amy Quinn than Donald Trump has pictures with adult film stars.

There was one other person mentioned I can’t connect to Quinn.  He said he really liked the scooters.  He had just been given a primer on how to ride them – by Asbury Park’s transportation manager – at City Hall – with the Press watching.  But that wasn’t a set up for the Press at all. Pure coincidence.

Someone from the Press please tell me if it’s fair reporting to have Amy Quinn’s pet project judged by every Amy Quinn sycophant in the world?  That’s not her fault nor the fault of her friends.  The beneficiary of good press is no more responsible than the victim of bad press.

I don’t mean to be too tough on the Asbury Park Press here.  Oh, who am I kidding.  Yes, I do.  Either the reporter knew all these people were connected to Quinn, or if he didn’t know, they need to assign someone to Asbury Park who knows the political players when he sees them.

The truth is these scooters are more hated than Lebron James in Hong Kong.  A quick review of social media unconnected to Amy Quinn shows people are complaining about them; one person complaining that they are like giving a loaded gun to a monkey.

People don’t know the rules of the road and where to ride them.  Pedestrians are being run down by them on the sidewalks and in the streets.  They are being left all over and creating tripping hazards.

The wheels of these mayhem makers were not designed for uneven surfaces.  Speaking of uneven surfaces, have you seen Asbury Park’s streets?  They should have done a pot-hole survey and filled in the craters before launching but failed to do that.

Other places that tried this dumped the program.  They might be Ok in a place where the goal is to get to work, but in Asbury, with 40 places to drink and get stoned within a half-mile, drunks are using them as an amusement ride.  Let’s face it – Asbury is becoming filled with people who think they moved to an “urban” place.  It’s a suburb.  It’s small enough to walk around without a terror-cycle.

The Asbury Park Press could have easily contacted police HQ and found out about all the people that are breaking bones or getting more road rash than Evel Knieval at Caesar’s Palace.

If this many people were getting hurt on an amusement ride, Asbury Park would shut it down.  Until they crash Satan’s Scooter program, I’ll just keep praying to St. Christopher, patron saint of travel, that no one gets killed.

 

 

Tom DeSeno

Tommy De Seno is a lawyer, political writer, and currently resides in the Smithsonian as the last conservative from Asbury Park. If you get hurt on a motorized scooter in Asbury Park, contact Tommy here:


 

 

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Posted: October 23rd, 2019 | Author: | Filed under: Monmouth County News, New Jersey, Opinion, Tommy DeSeno | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments »

11 Comments on “Satan’s Motorized Scooters in Asbury Park”

  1. You got said at 8:46 pm on October 23rd, 2019:

    rid of Steve Franks but kept this guy? Excellent.

  2. Patrick Tarantino said at 10:49 pm on October 23rd, 2019:

    How dare you besmirch Any Quinn! I’ve lived in Asbury Park for 15 years, through the corruption of previous councils and paid off employees!! We have the finest City Council and Mayor in our history! You’ve blown out the supposed injuries caused by the scooters and they all have tracking devices so they are not littering the streets. Employees track and return them. The program does need some regulations but it is a great way to get around town. You’re a hack trying to find fault in everything the city does. Amy is one of the hardest workers and biggest supporters the city has.

  3. Yikes. said at 9:57 am on October 24th, 2019:

    Was just in Austin, Tx, where the scooters swirl around pedestrians, and where many are just thrown haphazardly around the sidewalks-( sometimes getting in the way of panhandlers/ homeless on the street, ) guess it takes lots of follow- up and maintenance, to not have them become more of a hindrance. Was also wondering how that company was selected, ie, any competition?.. And, what the ultimate costs are: staff time, increased insurance premiums,loss, damage, theft, etc..

  4. Hugh Mungus said at 1:45 pm on October 24th, 2019:

    Where can you get stoned in Asbury Park? Asking for a friend.

  5. Bob Frapples said at 10:51 am on October 25th, 2019:

    Just more laziness by the millennials, God forbid they have to walk bar to bar. No wonder the obesity rate is skyrocketing in America

  6. Don Greenberg said at 11:46 am on October 25th, 2019:

    Not a fan of the scooters and this was an interesting & entertaining article. Then I got to the (IMHO) Ambulance Chasing ad for Mr. De Seno at the end. Excellent job of undermining your credibility, well done!

  7. How dare you said at 12:46 pm on October 25th, 2019:

    besmirch the character of Bruno Kirby?

  8. Focus, said at 6:28 pm on October 25th, 2019:

    they are just a bad idea, people are selfish slobs, it was recently on tv how some foreign cities are fining/ not allowing companies to market them- dangerous, polluting streets/ waterways when tossed/ abandoned, and costing entities too much time and money. Never mind the question of how some elected officials seem awfully susceptible to some grandiose sales pitches, for whatever their reasons…

  9. Just todsy said at 10:06 pm on October 25th, 2019:

    A stupid young girl jumped on a scooter proceeded in front of me and then did Au turn completely around without even looking and I almost ran over her because I didn’t have enough notice these things are dangerous and people are stupid you don’t put the 2 of them together

  10. What skin said at 11:09 pm on October 27th, 2019:

    does the author have in the game? I thought he lived 3o minutes outside of Asbury.

  11. Maybe has said at 9:45 am on October 28th, 2019:

    an office there, or just thinks it’s a bad idea- which it likely is… and, as for potential lawsuits, everybody needs to make a living..(having been brought up at the Shore, not all of us think Asbury’s doing all that great..it still has a long, long way to go..)